Week 30 - Futures F1 (M) - Senegal

Drew · Jul 22, 2007

Week 30 - Futures F1 (M) - Senegal

RobC · All-time great

I wonder if Akhanetan has made it down there to give us news from the trenches?

Grundon · Intermediate Club Player

In the Main Draw first round there are three Brits

Gregory Howe vs (Q) Sunday Emmanuel (NGR)
(Q) Fred Roelants vs (WC) Cheikh Salif Kante (SEN)
Amadeus Fulford-Jones vs Alain Ntamag (FRA)

Surely a good opportunity to pick up a ranking point here

ForeverDelayed · Grand Slam Champion

All 3 could pick up a ranking point here, as I doubt that Emmanuel and Kante are that good a player, so Howe and Roelants could definately win their opener

Mozart has the toughest of the matches, but it is one that he could win if he plays well

Plenty of Brits in the doubles as well

Greg Howe (GBR) /Giacamo Pirrozi (ITA) vs. Chankira (ZIM)/Sigue (BUR)
(3) El Alaoui (MOR)/Grassi (ITA) vs. Fred Roelants/David White (GBR)
Mark/Steele (ISR) vs. (2) De Bonnevie (FRA)/Amadeus Fulford-Jones (GBR)

Akhenaten · Pro player

RobC wrote:

I wonder if Akhanetan has made it down there to give us news from the trenches?

Hi, just flown in from Tehran. Had a lovely time. Prof. Vejmelka reappearance shocked everybody. After astonishingly winning Lithuania F1, Iran F4, Sudan F1, Rwanda F1, Uganda F1, Iran F5 & Iran F6 between August and November last year, Vejmelka mysteriously disappeared for 8 months. Then just as suddenly he reappeared in Tehran last week to take the Iran F2 title. There has been much media speculation over both his disappearance and his form. Some people believe he was abducted by aliens and injected with special tennis powers. I believe some people have too vivid an imagination.

Anyhow, just arrived in Dakar ready for the greatest tournament of the year - Senegal F1. And it's hot! It's so, so h

RobC · All-time great

Great to hear it: Any news why Rusevski and Westerhof haven't been able to make it to Senegal?

Akhenaten · Pro player

RobC wrote:

Great to hear it: Any news why Rusevski and Westerhof haven't been able to make it to Senegal?

Sorry, just fainted. Better now.

Boy Westerhof is currently in Belgium, trying to salvage his stalling pop career. Sadly, his Eurovision entry, "The Happy Camel", scored an embarrassing nul points, and he was driven out of the Netherlands by an angry mob of Dutch ravers. He has since sought refuge in a disused warehouse in Bruges. I wish him all the best.

And the news regarding Preg Rusevski is that he is going to be making his debut in the commentary booth for Macedonian radio. Unfortunately, Preg's grasp of Macedonian language is still very limited. During test broadcasts, his exclamation that "the ball was clearly a fish pie" had his fellow commentators bursting into uncontrollable laughter. Many experts are deeply confused as to what has motivated this career move, as since winning Ghana F1, he has taken 5 back-to-back tournaments, and surely has the tennis world at his feet.

Disappointingly, Vejmelka is also boycotting Sengy this year, sighting a major strawberry altercation as his reasoning.

But the Log is back! Komlavi Loglo is set to light up the Sengy courts yet again this year. Though his form hasn't been quite as electric as in other years, few will bet against the great man taking the Sengy title yet again.

Other exciting news is the return of George Barth; the 38 year-old Ohian Showman who was thought to have retired last year. Barth could not resist just one more crack at the illustrious Senegal F1 championships. And who can blame him?

This heat is unbearabl

-- Edited by Akhenaten at 13:37, 2007-10-12

Akhenaten · Pro player

Controversy

The strawberry controversy has deepened. Valentin Sanon, last year's runner-up, is threatening to pull out the tournament if the situation is not rectified soon.

Sanon stunned the world last year with his progress to the final, though he'd thoroughly proven himself on clay, he - like so many other Ivory Coast players - had shown few signs that he could reproduce that form on a hard court. But, he won over the support of the crowd with his effort and enthusiasm, and came very close to taking the title.

But today, Sanon, bursting with anger, exclaimed, "Strawberries and custard! What idiots mix strawberries and custard! If this is not made better soon. I leave. I am so angered!"

The tournament directors are now under serious pressure. With the absence of Vejmelka, Rusevski, Ndiaye (Senegal's long time favourite), and Bogdan "Victor" Leonte (currently recovering from a steamboat accident); there is a real danger of the credibility of this great tournament becoming undermined. It's a real shame as strawberries and custard has long been a tradition here. Some say it makes the tournament. Some say it is the tournament. Personally I'd prefer a bowl of hippo dung topped with a flake, but this isn't my battle. I'm off to toilet now; I'm feeling a little queasy.

-- Edited by Akhenaten at 13:39, 2007-10-12

Akhenaten · Pro player

The Opening Day

Centre Court: At 2pm precisely, Loglo, dressed in his trademark cream dinner jacket, adorned with straw-boater and parasol, was carried on to court on a Grecian couch by four minions. He graciously waved to crowd, who all instinctively bowed down low to greet the great player.

Between points, Loglo sipped at his champagne and indulged in Camembert and grapes. He struck a regal figure and royally fended off his Irish opponent, McGahon.

As he strode off, we all knew Komvali Loglo was in impeccable form, and woe betide any that stood in his way.

Akhenaten · Pro player

Meanwhile, out on Court 9, Senegal's Brahim Saffiedine lost to Loic Didavi, 6-2 6-4. But it was the after-match revelations that staggered everyone.

It was revealed that Saffiedine's coach, Henrik Sunderstrom, had been suspended from his post just minutes before the start of Saffiedines match. Sunderstrom is alleged to have been roaming the grounds, dressed as Po the Telly-Tubby, offering passers-by "plopperty-pinguses". These were in fact rubber penguins that he'd just bought hundreds of from Dakar's top toyshop. In his press conference, Saffiedine threw a hissy fit and blamed his lose wholly on the STA. "The tellytubbies are fab! Why ban tellytubbies! Youre all horrible!", prevaricated Saffiedine.

The former Senegal No.1 and five times Senegal F1 semi-finalist, Daouda Ndiaye, joined in the controversy by criticising his countrys players and governing body, saying, "Why oh why do they keep handing out wildcards to these players. Give 'em to the French. Give 'em to the Croatians. These players dont know theyre born. When I were a lad I had to get up at 4 o'clock in the morning (two hours before I went to bed), practice on hot coals for 27 hours a day..." Ndiaye concluded his rant with a complaint about a dead parrot hed recently bought in a Dakar pet shop not ten minutes before arriving at said press conference.

Then later, Bruce Woolagaroo, the head of the STA, defended the wildcard allocation, saying, "We need to support our players, okay some might be a bit rubbish, but thats all the more reason they need our support! By the way, does anyone know, did we ever get Aaron Krickstein?"

Some bloke called Becker weighed in too, but I wasn't listening, I was too busy laughing at his hat.

-- Edited by Akhenaten at 09:45, 2007-07-24

RobC · All-time great

So do we know the philosophies of the brits' oppenents, Emmanuel and Kant?

Akhenaten · Pro player

RobC wrote:

So do we know the philosophies of the brits' oppenents, Emmanuel and Kant?

very good!

Akhenaten · Pro player

"The Future of Senegali Tennis" returns

18 year-old Salif Kante, whom last year was proclaimed "the future of Senegali tennis" has since had a troubled year battling with injury. But back on the hallowed Senegal F1 courts, with a new sharp looking haircut, he seems to have found his form again, giving the home crowd a huge boost after the Sunderstrom affair. He beat Gert Briton's Fred Roelants 1-6 6-2 6-1 in a highly entertaining match.

gazzpash · Club Coach

Loving the reports! Makes a future sound like best tournament in world!!

Just seen other result is G Howe bt S Emmanuel 6-2 7-6 (5) Greg goes on to play the legend that is K Loglo!!!

Akhenaten · Pro player

Fattar Anas withdraws

The world of tennis is disappointed at the withdrawal of the No.3 seed, Fattar Anas. Medical reasons have been stated, but not elaborated upon. There had been much excitement over a potential quarter-final between Anas and Rudy Coco. But, sadly its not to be.